Things not to do in your lifetime

In your lifetime, based on (unfortunately) personal experience, I do not recommend doing any of the following:

1) Quitting your job without another job lined up unless you are prepared to accept financial, social, and psychological consequences

2) Quitting your job but letting the HR department talk you into just taking a "vacation" for a week and a half instead and then resuming your job in a part-time/temporary role while you look for other opportunities (Trust me: it's HIGHLY embarrassing to have everyone think you're leaving but then having to walk shamefacedly back into the office a week and a half later after you've failed to secure other employment and actually had to stare the prospect of paying for your own health insurance in the face. It's probably better to either tough the job out until you find other employment or to quit once and for all and pray your savings last you for a while.)

3) Stealing office supplies from the office of a co-worker who has left the company but caveated his resignation with the potential for coming back soon. There is a good chance he will be coming back, and there is a 100% chance that he will notice that someone scavenged his office in the week and a half he was gone. Seriously, to all the office supply vultures out there: please leave us our ergonomic mice. Our carpal tunnel does not disappear overnight, and it's already painful enough for us to be back at a job we hate without having to deal with severe wrist and hand pain on top of it.

4) Asking a co-worker who quit his job but returned to work a few weeks later any of the following:
A) "I thought you had left. What are you doing back here?"
B) "Why did you want to leave in the first place?"
C) "Is the job market that bad that you can't find work in a week and a half, or are you just a
big loser and incapable of finding any other gainful employment?"
D) "Did you put on a few pounds while you were out?"

5) Eating sugar-free gummy bears in any sort of quantity while at work. They do a number on your digestive system, believe me.